I took the weekend off from the script because I got three scripts sent to me that needed coverage. All three were from return clients, and I felt that it was a good point to take a break on the script since I had just finished the draft. One of the scripts I read was a new draft of a script I’ve read several times, and I think that the writer has actually gotten his script to a point that it’s ready to start shopping around. It’s always been a good script that came from a very good idea, but this draft finally tied a whole bunch of things together and eliminated a lot of other things that either weren’t working or weren’t as high in quality as the rest of the script. Another script that I read was a screenplay adaptation of a book that I wrote coverage on about a year and a half ago. The author of the book was not the screenwriter and it was interesting to see how another writer interpreted and adapted the original material.

Perhaps the most interesting project I read over the weekend, however, was also the shortest.

The writer sent me the first 13 pages of a screenplay she is working on. I was a little skeptical that I’d be able to do anything for her, but I’ve read two scripts for her in the past, and thought that I would take a look at the pages and giver he my thoughts.

At first my fears were confirmed. I read the pages, and it I had a hard time figuring out what to say. I liked the premise and the opening of the story had an interesting enough hook that made me feel like I wanted to read more. Then I started to think about the characters on these pages and their relationships to each other and to the story, and suddenly I had plenty to say. The main character was flat and uninteresting, and wasn’t giving the audience a reason to root for him. Also, his relationship with his son was flat as well. Just reading the opening 13 pages, I saw that the writer was missing opportunities for drama with the relationship between the father and the son. It was immediately clear to me that their relationship needed to be contentious, rather than the friendly relationship that the writer had started with. A contentious relationship between father and son is always more interesting, especially if they’re stuck together on a long journey, as these two are going to be.

Drama is about conflict and there’s a lot more potential for conflict when the relationship is contentious.

It also provides an opportunity for character growth. If the relationship is already good and positive, where is it going to go? Unless the goal is for them to grow apart as the story progresses, then it’s fine to have them start out the story close. However, if you want them to finish the story in a close relationship, then you should make them as far apart in life as you can at the beginning. It’s all about depth, and the writer had created a flat relationship that was going to need a lot more depth in order for it to hold the attention of an audience.

Another note that I was able to give to the writer based on these pages was that the main character wasn’t likable enough. By the time we’re 15 minutes into the movie, we need to know whether or not we like the main character if we’re going to follow him for the next 90-100 minutes. Something needs to have happened by then to get us on his side, and it wasn’t there yet.

Finally, I noted that we need to know why the journey that the main character is about to embark on is so important. The situation that the writer is currently proposing is confusing in that aspect, and opens up the story to a lot of questions, and that’s never a good thing, especially if you’re pitching to an executive.

The number of questions an executive has about your script is inversely proportional to your chances of selling it.

So by the time I was done writing the coverage, I had about a page and a half worth of notes for the writer. She emailed me back and told me that she felt they were very good notes and that they would help her as she progressed.

The point is that it’s never too early to get help on a script. Even incomplete work can be evaluated in a valuable way, and we can help if you’re writing something that you know is good, but for whatever reason, you’ve hit a block. Contact us at the link below, let us take a look at it, and we’ll help you break through.

http://monumentscripts.com/service/screenplay-coverage/

Happy writing.